Dating scary men: 6 types women should avoid

"I didn't know he was like that," I often hear women say when they come to the realisation that the men they're dating are nothing remotely like the blokes they thought they were with. Especially after they sleep with them. Sadly, it's all too common that a man suddenly morphs into one you're not quite that into once you've done the horizontal hanky panky, and you find yourself asking why you ever got involved with the cad in the first place.

So what goes wrong?
Perhaps it's the fear of the proverbial man drought in our midst that is causing single women to believe the only viable solution is to take what they can get, hence ignoring all the warning signs. Perhaps they have sex too soon. Or perhaps they simply don't value themselves enough to strive for someone who doesn't treat them mean in attempt to keep them keen.

So, buyer beware: there's an abundance of scary men out there who aren't what they seem, and I'm not talking about the ones who look so beefed up that they could have stepped right out of a special. (Although you might want to stay clear of those too ... )

MR ARROGANCE

Ever noticed that you're dating someone you think is funny, articulate and smart, and all of a sudden they'll pull out the old, "Oh baby, I can get anyone I want, so you should be lucky you're dating me" card? Believe me when I say things can morph quickly from sensual, sexy and fun to downright rude, insensitive and self-obsessed. By the way, arrogance should not be confused with confidence, which is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

THE ONE WITH A RAGING TEMPER

They might not show this trait immediately, but if you have even a tiny inkling that your man might be a ranging lunatic, it's time to get out, and fast. While this dude might tell you that his temper is strictly reserved for everyone but you, you don't want to wait till you've creased his shirt to discover that his anger gets a whole lot worse when it's pointed at your face.

THE CONTROL FREAK

Despite him being seemingly relaxed in the beginning, when your man begins to ask questions about your whereabouts, texts incessantly, tells you what to eat, how many sit-ups to do and how to do your job better, then you know you're in deep trouble. Introducing the control freak: he's the man who, no matter what you are doing or where you are going, will assume that you're sleeping around or doing the dirty behind his back. While his insecurities are clearly pegged right onto your back, don't think that it's ever going to get any easier.

THE WORKAHOLIC

He's hard working, earns loads of money and appears clued up about everything from politics to pashminas. He's obsessed with everything and anything that might improve himself and spends the entire date on his BlackBerry wondering how his stock portfolio is going. The problem in this equation is simply this: you. This dude is so obsessed with his career, making money and climbing the corporate ladder that, unfortunately, you, sweet girlfriend, come in at a distant second. He's always, (albeit genuinely) working late; spends more time on his laptop than he does canoodling with you in bed, and when you do have any spare time together he is often too tired to have a heart-to-heart, let alone get it up.

WOMANISER
You probably know the one: he believes he's uber-smart, sexy, courteous, funny, ridiculously handsome and sweeps you away like a beach house in a hurricane. The trouble arrives when you make the gut-wrenching discovery that you're not the only woman on his speed dial.
Candace Bushnell, creator of Sex And The City, calls them "toxic bachelors"; I call them "bad boys" and my friend Jade refers to them as bona fide "playboys". On a date, he's more likely to spend the entire night chatting up the waitress than focusing on you. He pervs on everything with two legs and a pair of breasts and is quick to let you know which famous actress or supermodel once left their underwear on his couch.

CHEAPSKATE
Finally, there's the cheapskate. He complains how expensive dinner was, refuses to give you $2 for the parking meter (you had to drive so he would save petrol), doesn't tip the waiter and complains when you wear a new pair of shoes claiming you spend way too much cash on unnecessary things ... Enough said.