Female empowerment. I've long been a fan of anything that gives women a confidence boost, elevates self worth and makes them feel better about themselves than eating ice-cream from the tub or watching Sex and the City episodes alone.
But when Britain's Environment Secretary Caroline Spelman recently came out with the shocking opinion that wearing a burka could actually be "empowering" and "dignifying" to women, I was flabbergasted.
Really? Her comments were immediately lampooned as "ironic" and "bizarre" by the press and public alike, as many rushed to discount her suggestion that seemed to hold about as much weight as Nicole Richie's right toe.
"Burka empowering women? You must be mad, minister!" tut-tutted a headline in Britain's Daily Mail newspaper in an article written by Muslim journalist Yasmin Alibhai-Brown. While many might have expected her to agree with Spelman, she says that her opinion is quite the contrary.
"She is wrong," Alibhai-Brown writes. "Her fatuous and ill-conceived defence of the burka rendered me apoplectic with fury. Does she even understand the harm she does by sanctioning this perversion of our faith?" Probably not.
Spelman’s comments came after she was asked what she thought about the new push to ban women wearing burkas in Europe, to which she responded with this: "One of the things we pride ourselves on in this country is being free, and being free to choose what you wear is a part of that, so actually banning the burka is absolutely contrary I think to what this country is all about."
In an attempt to get inside the heads of her shrouded sisters, Alibhai-Brown decided to go covered up for a day and surmised that she felt anything but empowered. "I felt wiped out, a nobody - lifeless and voiceless," she said.
So let's get back to this enigma of female empowerment. What is it? How do we get it? And why the heck do so many mistake its true meaning?
I understand that we live in a society in which the pressures on women to look, act and be a certain way have sanctioned all sorts of strange behaviour. But are too many women seeking external aids in an attempt to rejuvenate their state of mind?
Breast implants are on the rise to such an extent that it's difficult to walk into a club without running into a sea of silicone. Yet many women I speak to claim that they do it "for themselves" rather than to spruik some male attention. (Seriously?)
Having Botox shots has become as common as a trip to the dentist, with even singer Charice (who shot to fame after she was hand-picked by Oprah as a young star to watch) foregoing her natural facial lines and contours to get a "smoother" appearance for her upcoming television debut. (Yes, she's only 18!)
Joanna Krupa – a US model who has been voted the sexiest model in the world - has said that posing for Playboy magazine is mightily empowering. "Finally a woman gets paid more than a man for comparable work," she told Hollie McKay from Fox News. "She gets to set the rules, gets to be in a real team work with other women, as many key positions at Playboy are in fact held by women! She brings in her creative ideas, gets involved in the photo selection and ends up with something she co-created through and through." Right.
Then there's teen pop tart Miley Cyrus who has recently insisted that her new album – where she is scantily clad (in her videoclip) and claims she can’t be tamed by a man (in her song lyrics) – actually empowers women. (Say what!?)
And finally the BBC News recently reported that online dating actually empowers women! Yep, Dr Petra Boynton, sex editor of Men's Health magazine, said in an interview: "A lot of women say they find it quite empowering because they can ask things, demand things and flirt. For instance, many women find it hard to say 'I don't want to see you again' but online they can. So it can be used just to improve your confidence outside of the internet."
While I've recently dabbled in the world of online dating (for research purposes ... and surprisingly it wasn't as scary as you might think), empowering it was not. There's rejection (just from your photo!), all sorts of ulterior motives, constant fear of the unknown and having to put your best foot forward on a date all the while being judged by a complete stranger whom you may not even like yet, but hope they'll like you anyway.
To me, female empowerment isn't about the external or having men chasing you; it's about finding yourself, being comfortable with being by yourself and surrounding yourself with quality, loyal, kind people who actually care about you.
Of course a nice dinner date wouldn't go astray either, but it's when you can say no to the dates you don't want to go on ... Now that's empowerment to me ...
What do you think? Is a burka empowering
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